September 26, 2017

U.S. Pacific Fleet Commander Scott Swift has announced his intention to retire, having lost both his submarine and his destroyer within the first five turns.

He advises his successors to continue a hard stance against Peking peeking.

Prosecutors plan to charge several college basketball coaches with fraud and corruption for accepting bribes from financial advisors who wanted the coaches to steer players into becoming clients. However, the coaches were merely following the advice of their financial advisors who assured them it was alright to take a bribe from them.

Forty conservative Catholic scholars have sent a letter to Pope Francis accusing him of heresy for promoting the acceptance of homosexuals and divorced people. The tone of the letter can best be described as closeted aggressive.

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