Justin Beiber accidentally hit a paparazzi with his car. By all reports, he then behaved disappointingly appropriately.
A fisherman’s boat was attacked by an Orca in Alaska. The fisherman said he had just watched Jaws the previous day. So too had the Orca.
After watching Blackfish the next day, the fisherman went back and allowed the whale to kill him.
The fisherman’s son has received a free lifetime pass to Seaworld which the cartoonishly evil amusement park is sure he will never use.
[Reporter’s Confession: I went to Seaworld as a kid and I would still go. I also don’t recycle very often.]